Your Morning Dept Of Dry Heaving

Another day, another gun murder in Possibility Compassionate City. [WDRB]

A Jefferson Circuit Court judge Friday denied motions to release five inmates from jail on the grounds that district judges refused to consider their financial status in setting bonds or consider granting them bail credit for each day they spent behind bars. [C-J/AKN]

Uh, both Dan Johnson and GLI are hot messes so none of this really matters. But hoo boy when is the crazy going to end? Nothing Dan Johnson says is anything but offensive. [WHAS11]

The $14.9 billion Kentucky Retirement Systems plans to end its controversial investments in hedge funds. [John Cheves]

Surely this isn’t the first time the teevee people have heard about a skeever in the Highlands? There are at least three of those creepers who flash their junk on a regular basis. [WLKY]

Following the news of yet another “warmest month ever,” NASA has basically called it: This year will be the hottest since record-keeping began in 1880. [HuffPo]

WARNING! RIDICULOUS AUTOPLAY VIDEO! Tuesday’s deadly shooting in Old Louisville is a setback for the historic neighborhood building a new reputation. [WAVE3]

As Election Day approaches and the polls continue to look dire for Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump, he is pinning the blame on everything except himself. [ThinkProgress]

As a shortage of primary care physicians looms across the nation and Kentucky, state lawmakers are considering whether to expand the role of physician assistants by allowing them to prescribe controlled substances. [WFPL]

Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump has disparaged “flat-chested” women, mocked a Miss Universe for her weight gain and bragged about groping women because he’s famous. [ProPublica]

If a new study by Zippia is correct, only one community in the Louisville area has figured out the secret of success. [Business First]

With more people in the audience than a typical school board meeting, most of the candidates running for seats in the New Albany-Floyd County Consolidated School Corp. got a chance to answer questions at a forum Thursday. [News & Tribune]

JCPS Scandals Have Gone On For Years, Probably Won’t End Soon

Two Jefferson County Public Schools employees have been suspended and a third has resigned after a student on a special needs school bus was sexually assaulted by another student. [WDRB]

Just when it appeared the fight between the University of Louisville Foundation and the school’s board of trustees was subsiding, both sides Thursday hurled angry charges and countercharges at each other. [C-J/AKN]

WARNING! RIDICULOUS AUTOPLAY VIDEO! Lonnie Ali is still very much grieving the loss of her spouse while learning to navigate without the man she calls her soul mate. [WHAS11]

Kentucky judges need to be paid more, Supreme Court Chief Justice John D. Minton Jr. told state lawmakers Friday. [H-L]

While Advanced Placement exam scores in Kentucky improved this year, the number of test takers went down. [WLKY]

Shutting down for-profit detention facilities would hurt Immigration and Customs Enforcement’s ability to do its job, agency director Sarah Saldaña said Thursday amid a review over whether the government should do just that. [HuffPo]

A group of Louisville attorneys is calling for Jefferson County Public Schools (JCPS) to install metal detectors at its middle and high schools because of “the continuing danger of gun violence.” [WAVE3]

On Wednesday, Donald Trump Jr. told Pittsburgh Tribune-Review he doesn’t think the Trump Organization’s international operations would be problematic if his dad were elected president. [ThinkProgress]

You’ve heard Jack Fox’s voice before, even if you don’t know him by name. Think back to the last time you were at the airport — any airport, really. Remember that voice that alerts you to the fact that “the moving walkway is now ending?” That’s Jack Fox. [WFPL]

Donald Trump’s campaign isn’t alone in patronizing his own businesses: taxpayers are indirectly doing so, too. Federal Election Commission records show that the U.S. Secret Service has paid the Trump campaign about $1.6 million to cover the cost of flying its agents with the candidate on a plane owned and operated by one of his companies. [Politico]

Something about this makes our eyes roll back in our heads… Total Wine & More plans to open its first Louisville store on Thursday, Oct. 6. [Business First]

River Ridge is one step closer to demolishing the remaining vestiges of the Indiana Army Ammunition Plant located on their property. [News & Tribune]

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JCPS Drama Part… What Part Is This?

Citing a strong objection to the approach Jefferson County Public Schools has taken to negotiate employee wages over the past few months, four major unions who represent more than 13,000 employees sent a letter to the school board Monday pleading with members to “provide oversight and direction.” [WDRB]

A Texas-based company wants to open a methadone clinic in a non-residential area of downtown Louisville, near Seventh and Magazine streets. [C-J/AKN]

WARNING! RIDICULOUS AUTOPLAY VIDEO! The East End Bridge appears to be one link away from being finished. When it’s open by this winter, did you know that there’s no exit into Prospect for drivers from Indiana? [WHAS11]

Matt Bevin appointed three people Friday to the University of Kentucky Board of Trustees, including one of Kentucky’s top Republican fundraisers. [H-L]

Someone else has been found dead inside a car in Compassionate City. A homicide investigation is underway in the 600 block of South 44th Street. [WLKY]

Aetna Inc, the No. 3 U.S. health insurer, on Monday said that due to persistent financial losses on Obamacare plans, it will sell individual insurance on the government-run online marketplaces in only four states next year, down from the current 15 states. [HuffPo]

Louisville judge suspended without pay will get a sizeable amount of cash elsewhere. [WAVE3]

The U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration on Thursday denied requests to stop classifying marijuana as a dangerous drug with no medical use, leaving users and businesses in limbo after many states have legalized it for medical or recreational purposes. [Reuters]

As Nashville considers whether to decriminalize possession of small amounts of marijuana, we wondered whether a similar effort could take hold in Louisville. The short answer is, despite some interest in doing so, a decisive no. [WFPL]

Hillary Clinton has released her tax returns, adding to the pressure on her Republican rival for the White House, Donald Trump, to do the same. [BBC]

Jefferson County Public Schools on Monday named Lisa Herring as the school system’s chief academic officer. [Business First]

VT Industries will soon be closing its doors in New Albany. [News & Tribune]

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A Deadly Week In Compassionate City

The Jefferson County Coroner’s Office has identified two people who died in a triple shooting in the Parkland neighborhood Tuesday night. [WDRB]

Highlands, Buechel, Fern Creek people, et al get ready! Costco has affirmed that it will open its long-anticipated, second membership warehouse in Louisville on Saturday, Aug. 27. [C-J/AKN]

A man was transported to the hospital after a shooting in Old Louisville Tuesday evening. [WHAS11]

The Herald-Leader editorial board handed Jerry Miller’s behind to him. [H-L]

WARNING! RIDICULOUS AUTOPLAY VIDEO! Two people have died and one other person was injured after gunfire broke out at a birthday party in west Louisville. [WLKY]

When Indiana Democrat Evan Bayh, who is running for his old Senate seat, left Congress in 2011, he cited dysfunction, gridlock and the outsize influence of “entrenched” special interests on lawmakers. He even floated returning to Indiana to teach, telling Ezra Klein he felt he could “make a bigger difference in a different capacity.” [HuffPo]

Property taxes are going down again slightly in Louisville Metro, the city’s mayor and chief financial officer announced on Wednesday. [WAVE3]

One of Obamacare’s major provisions — which is bitterly opposed by most Republicans — has helped improve patients’ insurance coverage, financial situation, and overall quality of life, according to a new study. [ThinkProgress]

A study of drinking water systems found 6 million Americans, including people in West Virginia, Kentucky, and Ohio, are living with drinking water containing chemicals linked to a host of health problems. [WFPL]

Former Pennsylvania Governor Ed Rendell, who presided over the state’s fracking boom of the mid-2000s, admitted the state’s fracking regulations favored economics over environmental safety during much of his tenure. [ThinkProgress]

Officials at GE Appliances are engaged in what’s called “effects bargaining” with leaders of the International Brotherhood of Electrical Workers local 2249 in Bloomington, Ind. [Business First]

Plans for a barrier within the town hall that would lift the weapons ban placed last May could be on hold until it’s determined whether the building is ready for such construction. [News & Tribune]

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Wednesday Morning Dept Of Awful

LMPD released footage Monday from two body cameras as a suspect reportedly wielding a “large curved bladed object” was shot and killed by two officers. [WDRB]

Losing the Kentucky International Convention Center for a 22-month renovation and expansion may be a blow for downtown hotels and restaurants, but the $207 million project should pay big benefits for all business in the long run, say officials sponsoring the project. [C-J/AKN]

WARNING! RIDICULOUS AUTOPLAY VIDEO! Monday, a judge in Franklin County Circuit Court asked attorneys for Kentucky Governor Matt Bevin and Attorney General Andy Beshear for more information he needs before deciding the lawsuit involving the University of Louisville Board of Trustees. [WHAS11]

A Louisville judge, incensed when a prosecutor questioned his authority to scrap a jury panel because it lacked minorities, did not turn to appeals courts, legal precedent or other avenues typical for aggrieved jurists. [H-L]

A western Kentucky man who spent several days in jail for posting violent song lyrics to Facebook has settled a lawsuit against the county where he was jailed. [WLKY]

Two prominent scholars are calling B.S. on a popular conservative argument about poverty. [HuffPo]

WARNING! RIDICULOUS AUTOPLAY VIDEO! The names of the Louisville Metro Police Department officers involved in the fatal shooting of a man in southwest Louisville have been released. [WAVE3]

The US economy added a stronger-than-expected 255,000 jobs in July, fuelling speculation that interest rates could rise before the end of the year. [BBC]

Alberta Jones’ life was one of firsts. She was the first African-American woman to pass the Kentucky bar and the first female prosecutor in Jefferson County. But 51 years ago Friday, Jones’ life came to an abrupt end. Her body was found on the banks of the Ohio River near the Sherman Minton Bridge. The case was never solved. [WPFL]

During a 33-year career at the Central Intelligence Agency, I served presidents of both parties — three Republicans and three Democrats. I was at President George W. Bush’s side when we were attacked on Sept. 11; as deputy director of the agency, I was with President Obama when we killed Osama bin Laden in 2011. [NY Times]

A federal judge has agreed to hear one of the insurance mega-merger cases but has handed off the other. [Business First]

Charlestown resident Tim Stoner is familiar with Clark County’s new roundabouts, but he wouldn’t call himself a friend of them. [News & Tribune]

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Insanity. Is There A Full Moon Or What?

Didn’t link to any of these stories yesterday because they’re all so horrifically sad. [WDRB]

The Independent Pilots Association, the collective bargaining unit for UPS pilots, is turning up the heat on the shipping giant by opening a strike operations center in Louisville. [C-J/AKN]

WARNING! RIDICULOUS AUTOPLAY VIDEO! Another day, another person dead from a gunshot in Compassionate City. [WHAS11]

Tim Longmeyer, a former secretary of the state Personnel Cabinet under former Gov. Steve Beshear, pleaded guilty in federal court Tuesday to bribery. [H-L]

A Jefferson County judge answered to charges of misconduct Tuesday. Judge Sheila Collins is accused of improperly jailing a victim of domestic violence who recanted her story last June. [WLKY]

Tea people just don’t like it when elected officials actually do their jobs. [HuffPo]

Decision-makers at Moore Traditional School decided not to appeal Vicki Lete’s removal as Principal of Moore Traditional School. [WAVE3]

The Kentucky Lottery has launched into online gambling, becoming the third state to offer lottery sales online after Michigan and Georgia. Minnesota implemented then banned online sales in 2015 after faith-based groups protested scratch-off sales. [More H-L]

When Aetna announced its move to buy Louisville born-and-bred insurer Humana last year, more than a few antitrust sirens sounded. [WFPL]

Former U.N. climate chief Christiana Figueres has credited faith groups for helping to advance the Paris Climate Agreement by supporting “holistic, equitable, but above all, ambitious climate action.” [ThinkProgress]

Don’t expect to see Papa Johns International Inc. introduce its own pizza delivery vehicle the way Domino’s did last year. [Business First]

It’s sometimes hard for people to grasp, but New Albany is ranked in the top three in the state on a list that has nothing to do with basketball. [News & Tribune]