Jerry Abramson is adjusting to his new life as lieutenant governor. His new job that has absolutely no constitutional duties. So he literally does nothing all day. [WHAS11]

Just a reminder that Louisville needs sidewalks for a very important reason. Something people like Anne Northup and Jerry Abramson ignored for a long time. [Broken Sidewalk]

Expanded gambling will certainly dominate this legislative session in Frankfort. While actual issues of importance get relegated to the sidelines again. [FOX41]

The Newburg Boys & Girls Club could open as early as this month. And that’s why Louisville can have nice things. [Business First]

But it wouldn’t be Louisville if there weren’t another story about a teenager being charged in two murders. [WLKY]

We can apparently expect a few more rumblings about the Drumanard property this week. [WAVE3]

Really, you still want to pretend Terry Holliday and the rest of Steve Beshear’s crew aren’t corrupt as all hell? Don’t expect Adam Edelen to pull off a promised education audit, either. [NYT]

Here comes the reaction on a state level about the Terry Holliday-KDE financial corruption. [H-L]

What did Greg Fischer/Chris Poynter even say about the decision on the University of Louisville Hospital merger decision? [WFPL]

Frankfort rolls back to action this week with the 2012 legislative session and Greg Stumbo says no action will be taken against his corrupt friend, Keith Hall. [Page One]

Regardless of what happens today with the University of Louisville Hospital merger decision, Kentuckians will still be screwed. You already expect it, we know. [FOX41]

Pro-tip to to Patti Swope: Stop spamming us and everyone else with unsolicited press releases. Or get a new PR agent who takes your business relationships more seriously. [Come On]

WHAS11 explores the lives of 3 transgendered women living in Louisville. And, of course, that exploration pushes nothing but stereotypes. Come on, Gene. [WHAS11]

As I explained to Curt Morrison at the time, and he apparently didn’t take to heart, the person who solicited inaugural funds from Ed Hart and Bruce Lunsford was Tommy Elliott, not Christy Brown. I know because they told me so and have email trails to back it up. Even KREF is ignorantly placing blame in her lap. Christy may be the River Fields frenemy everybody loves to hate but she wasn’t involved in that mess of Greg Fischer’s. Maybe every other mess, but not that one. That’s all Tommy Elliott, Jim Mims and Bill Bardenwerper. Hopefully Christy will finally learn her lesson about trying to play power broker for her favorite little boy, Greg. [Curt Morrison]

Oh, look, the Ohio River Bridges Debacle talking points are spreading amongst the loyal. Thank goodness Kentucky has no money and won’t be able to build a downtown bridge. [Business First]

You’ve seen the corruption Greg Stumbo admits publicly he’ll do nothing about, right? Because it involves his friend, Keith Hall? The guy Crit Luallen fingered in a massive audit? The guy Jack Conway refuses to investigate? The guy the Ethics Commission fined and spanked? Yeah. [Page One]

Frankfort is still living in the dark ages, believing their pseudoephedrine legislation will solve the meth problem. Something that’s only really an issue in ten counties. And wouldn’t be if more than 30% of doctors and pharmacists actually used systems that already exist. But that’s the Kentucky way – raising costs to Medicaid, killing tax revenue and playing to fears. [C-J/AKN]

Sorry, WAVE, you didn’t have an exclusive on Senate Republicans meeting with Steve Beshear on gambling. Every outlet with a reporter in Frankfort or covering Frankfort had the story and interviews. [WAVE3]

We can’t decide if this story makes Greg Fischer look disconnected or just a bit confused when it comes to the economy. [NYT]

Here’s a history nerd look at vintage buses of Louisville’s transit past. Remember when Louisville had transit dreams? [Broken Sidewalk]

Maybe we should try harder to prevent teenage obesity? [CNN]

The Bridges Debacle group may move the planned pedestrian walkway. That’s not terrible, right? [FOX41]

An “energy” conference is being held at the Galt House on April 20. To give you an idea of the sort of “energy” being discussed, here’s the speaker list: Steve Beshear, Greg Stumbo and Len Peters. [Business First]

A man was severely beaten by a group of teenagers at First and Market Streets. [WAVE3]

Teach for America is placing 30 teachers per year in Eastern Kentucky for three years. [H-L]

UPS plans to change cockpits after the plane crash in Dubai that killed two pilots. [WHAS11]

Yes, yet another restaurant has opened in Louisville. We can’t go a day without having new food to pig out on. [Consuming Louisville]

Did your name get dropped by President Barack Obama? If so, the entire country is talking about it. [FatLip]

Does Democratic candidate for Secretary of State Alison Grimes have problem with her campaign narrative? Telling two different stories to different press-types? [Page One]

Can you really call the staff reorganization at three area high schools a “shake up” if it’s been expected for a year? [WHAS11]

You thought the Karen Sypher-Rick Pitino sexytime scandal was over? Fat chance. Now she wants to remain out of prison on bail as she appeals her case. Also, we’re still waiting on that “damning evidence” she claims to have that exonerates her. [H-L]

Funny how the job description for the directorship of Louisville Metro Animal Services continues to change. Last week the top spot was reposted with lesser educational wants. Now no degree is required for the $90K/year job. Wonder who Greg has in mind for the job now? Must be a back to scratch somewhere. [Deep Fischer Thoughts]

I’ve got a spending priority for Greg Fischer: stop giving away hundreds of thousands of dollars all Jerry Abramson-style without the approval of Metro Council because you want to impress your rich friends and appease your daddy. [FOX41]

Apparently, according to Public Works & Assets, the city has no paving list. And there are no funding sources in line to pave streets that need it badly. Imagine that. [Deep Metro Thoughts]

Branden Klayko has a new story about the Iron Quarter nightmare plaguing downtown. It’s called “Paved Paradise along Whiskey Row.” You already know the story, but it’s nice to see this getting national attention. [Architect's Newspaper]

Could the Democratic Speaker of the State House, Greg Stumbo, be sending hints to Congressman John Yarmuth that he needs to be careful on the mountaintop removal front? That’s what we hear from both camps, despite an official denial from Yarmuth’s Washington office. [Page One]

Applications are now being accepted for the 2012 class of Leadership Louisville. Apparently, it’s essential to success in Louisville? I’ve never found that to be the case, but who knows? [WAVE3]

The 2011 stargazing season at E.P. “Tom” Sawyer State Park begins Friday, March 11 at 7:00 P.M. The Louisville Astronomical Society will open the doors on the nation’s only state park-based astronomy center. [Press Release & Louisville Astro]

You don’t have to live in Pikeville to know there are problems with the Mountain Water District and Utility Management Group.

Regular readers of Page One have known for years that there’s a problem in the hills and it’s a classic case of good old boys and wasted money. Unfortunately, in this case, those wasted dollars are in the millions and we’re all left footing the bill.

Oh, and by good old boys, we’re obviously talking about State Representative W. Keith Hall, the gentleman pictured in the photograph at left. An alleged man of the cloth, no less.

CLICK HERE to read the rest of the scathing audit released in Frankfort this afternoon…

So OF COURSE Steve Beshear is a-okay with folks openly carrying guns inside legislative chambers. And you folks get pissy when I legitimately criticize him. You should be ashamed. [AP]

The Associated Press has finally caught on to the John Deasy job in Los Angeles. The Robert Felner scandal lives. [San Francisco Chronicle]

Do you qualify for the Earned Income Tax Credit? Then apply for it. Governor Steve Beshear held a press conference to discuss it yesterday – in a grasp at political points – but it was still a good move. [Press Release]

Greg Stumbo isn’t afraid to tell people to stop smoking in cars with children. But he’s afraid to talk about allowing guns in Frankfort’s legislative chambers. [H-L]

Do you think Bill Samuels (HINT KIRBY ADAMS HINT) will send us about 4,000 bottles of Makers 46 to mark his retirement from Maker’s Mark? [FOX 41]

Dear cops: Threatening handicapped folks in line at McDonald’s with your gun is a great way to make a bad name for the entire police force. Stop it. One idiot shouldn’t get to ruin life for everyone. [WAVE3]

The 2011 Kentucky Derby Festival Royal Court has been announced. Caitlin Carter of Big Spring, Katie Huber of Glasgow, Trisha Maclin of Marion, Laura Don Oliver of Princeton, Lauren Smith of Lexington, Kara Schultz of Louisville. [WHAS11]

Car-Free Happy Hour takes place tomorrow from 5:30 to 8:00 in Germantown. [Consuming Louisville]

Everybody is just so mad that Ken Herndon isn’t on the council. [Fat Lip]

State government budget cuts are ready to roll into action. The budget director sent a fancy letter to cabinet heads yesterday. [Page One]

Yesterday Papaw Governor Steve Besehar appointed Mary Gwen Wheeler to the State Board of Education. Chatter amongst yourselves. [Press Release]

Farmers’ markets accepting food stamps? Yes, please. I think that’s something we can all support.

Todd Lally claims a poll done by “Derby City Polls” has him at 43, John Yarmuth at 44 with 13% undecided. Hahaha. [Announced On Facebook]

Embargoed by the White House until 12:01 A.M. this morning: Thacker-Grigsby Telephone Company, Inc won $7.4 million to deploy a fiber-optic network in portions of Breathitt County. 3,000 people, 60 businesses and 34 community institutions stand to benefit from the project. [Click the Clicky]

Maybe you should head down to East Market tonight for this local artists thing. [Consuming Louisville]

Louisville allegedly has one of the most thriving stand-up comedy scenes in the country. [LEO Weekly]

The National Conference of State Legislatures is coming to Louisville this month. Greg Stumbo & David Williams have recorded a welcome video. [Page One]

The stalled Legacy Lofts project is about to see new life in downtown. Check out the photos and read all about it. The hideous color scheme is out (taupe, though? ugh), thankfully. All gays and people of taste rejoice! It’s just too bad no normal folks will be able to afford any of the units. [Broken Sidewalk]

Really? This is news in the U.S. Senate race? [WHAS11]

Hey, lawyer-types, read up on this crazy story of a law firm and medical clinic allegedly trading clientele. [Andy Wolfson]

St. Louis-based Paul Harris will be on the air this week filling the spot once held by Francene at 84WHAS. Every morning I wake up hoping to hear that Joe Elliott has been given that midday slot. But Harris is a great host. [Paul Harris]

$1.75 million. That’s what the city plans to spend on the planning and design of a southwest library. [C-J]

Some people think Jim Bunning should be locked away in a home. Some people think he’s a genius for starving Kentuckians to death. What do you think? [FatLip]

Greg Stumbo was for higher education budget cuts before he was against them, or something? The amount of flip-flopping and all-around mess this legislative session is tough to keep track of. [H-L]

Louisville takes the top two spots in AmericanStyle’s best art fairs list. Kentucky Crafted, The Market and St. James Court Art Show. [WFPL]

Speaking of Ward-Pugh, go vote for her in the ‘Most Admired’ contest at Today’s Woman! [Click the Clicky]

Kentucky’s environment is going to pot but Democrats aren’t keen on doing anything about it. Greg Stumbo favors allowing Jim Gooch to spew his weight in propaganda. And, no, Stumbo doesn’t really live in Prestonsburg. [Ronnie Ellis]

Fairdale Bigfoot may no longer be running for mayor, but he’s still got all kinds of advice for you. Especially if you’re troubled in the relationship department. [Consuming Louisville]

The next piece of the Wayside block redevelopment puzzle is in place. East Market Street is going gangbusters. [Broken Sidewalk]

There’s always been deep corruption in Southeastern Kentucky. But the latest audit from Crit Luallen details serious troubles with the Whitley County Sheriff. Check out the massive waste, fraud and abuse. [Page One]

Metro Government is definitely playing chicken with PETA. But who really wants a disgusting chicken statue erected, you know, anywhere? Hard to pick a side in this fight. [LEO Weekly]

Your best friend, coal shill Steve Beshear, is pulling some shiz in Frankfort today:

What could Governor Steve Beshear do to ruin I Love Mountains Day and draw necessary attention away from the anti-mountaintop removal gathering?

Why, work to arrange and promote another gathering at the exact same time and exact same place.

-SNIP-

It’d be easy to overlook this as a scheduling coincidence if the governor and his crew weren’t consistently working on behalf of King Coal– like in Wheelright the past week.  And if several closed-minded white guys (coal shills, it should be noted) who have a history of saying things like “African-American blacks” weren’t featured prominently.

Click here for the details.