You know you want to win a fancy copy of Jim Higdon’s Cornbread Mafia! Go enter ASAP and consider supporting his Kickstarter project to take the book on tour. [Page One

Sure, some cops are idiots like this unhinged LMPD officer but not all of them are. This douchebag gives cops a bad name. [FOX41]

All the folks who had nothing else to write about yesterday freaked out over John Yarmuth sending a letter to Mitch McConnell. It’s like everyone quickly forgets that Mitch McConnell has been lying about health care reform for more than two years. John is just now feeling safe enough to speak up a little bit. He’s still so nervous about it, in fact, that both his government staff and campaign staff selectively shared the letter with those they felt were friendly. So let’s quit with the, “Oh, John is so brave” bullshiz. He’s a solid congressman but this isn’t some big thing. [TPM]

Woah, it’s almost shocking that a man was pulled from the Ohio River and he wasn’t dead. Because it seems like there’s a new body pulled from the river every five seconds. [WAVE3]

Welp, Bobby Petrino got shiz-canned by Arkansas. So much for all the sneaky lady funtimes he had. [HuffPo]

Your new po-leece boss is reacting to the Beecher Terrace arrest video. He’s set to address the community on April 17. [WHAS11]

Mmmm hmmm. Indiana plans to issue a long-awaited economic impact study on the Ohio River Bridges Project as early as next week, but it’s unclear how broad — or how useful — its findings will be. [C-J/AKN]

Here comes Cheri Bryant-Hamilton again pretending that ending alcohol sales in various neighborhoods will solve all Louisville’s problems. [WLKY]

We all love Carmichael’s and hope it doesn’t go the way of ear X-tacy but it seems like that could be in the cards in a few years. [WFPL]

Whattya mean the mega wealthy who head companies with serious bases in Louisville get tax breaks to take flights on private jets? [Business First]

And then head over to the Red Cross site and make a donation marked for disaster relief. [Red Cross]

Kentucky Emergency Management says cash contributions are more important at this point than hard goods. So give to the Red Cross like we’ve been saying for a week. [CLICK HERE]

Did you know? Louisville is still fat and unhealthy. Was this a good even or a cheerleading session? We’re honestly asking, not being jerks. [C-J/AKN]

Guess who got his prosthetic leg! This is why Louisville can have nice things. [Click Here]

We’re all thankful that UPS made a $100,000 contribution to the Red Cross. More wealthy folks and businesses need to do the same. [Giving Back]

We’re linking this story again because it’s getting swept under the rug with all the tornado coverage. You’re going to be paying big tolls to cross the bridges. [FOX41]

Smart paint promises to make it easier to identify and repair cracks or corrosion in bridges and other infrastructure. We know a few Louisville bridges that are sorely in need of this. [The Economist]

At least this video from WAVE3 is better than that self-serving thing they did patting themselves on the back for tornado coverage. [WAVE3]

Ford CEO Alan Mulally got $34.5 million in stock. He can totally afford to give a couple hundred thousand to the Red Cross. [Business First]

This woman. She is precisely why you need to support tornado relief efforts. Watch the video. [WLKY]

The Mine Safety and Health Administration released an internal review of its actions prior to the Upper Big Branch mine disaster. [WFPL]

If you’re dumb enough to get scammed out of money when helping tornado victims in 2012, that’s your fault. Give directly to the Red Cross. You don’t need to know anything else. You don’t even have to give during one of these television events, either. Just give to the Red Cross. [WHAS11]

If you missed First Lady Michelle Obama’s visit, go read Joe Gerth’s article about what she had to say. [C-J/AKN]

Yes, animal abuse laws in Kentucky need more bite. But this is Kentucky. You know how things work. State Government works hard to cover up illegal cockfighting rings that exist within state government. So it’s no surprise. [WKYT]

Here comes the local television “news” love fest of the new police chief. We hope it’s worth it. [WHAS11]

Take a look at all the comments from LMPD officers and their reactions to Steve Conrad’s selection as chief. [More]

What? The Koch Family and the fair board didn’t offer specifics about funding? You don’t say. [FOX41]

We mentioned this on Page One yesterday but Procter & Gamble is nixing thousands of jobs, which will hurt Northern Kentucky. [Business First]

So no one pays attention to school buses loaded down with kids in Louisville, right? That’s why there’s a new JCPS bus accident every other day? [WAVE3]

David Hawpe wrote an op-ed about how “ramrodding” the University of Pikeville plan is a bad move for Kentucky. That’ll anger Greg Stumbo’s ego a bit. [H-L]

No, WLKY, your headline is not accurate. Proposal To Allow Voters To Decide On Gambling Defeated – it wasn’t a proposal to allow voters to decide on gambling. It was a proposal to allow voters to decide on slots with a constitutionally guaranteed tie to a single industry. It wasn’t gambling in general. [WLKY]

This mild winter brings welcome respite and mixed blessings. Go listen to / read this story. [WFPL]

A Louisville Metro Police officer’s badge may have saved his life, literally. It happened as officers responded to a home invasion call in the Churchill Downs area around 1 a.m. Friday morning. [84WHAS]

Louisville’s Metro Sewer District has severed ties with its board attorney, Larry Zielke, after hundreds of millions of years. Only because of a scandalous audit. And everything will continue getting swept under the rug. [C-J/AKN]

One of your area legislators says Frankfort can have a nice session this year. We’ll believe it when we see it. [Page One]

Metro Parks is hosting a public meeting on the 17th to discuss plans for A.B. Sawyer Park. 7:00-8:30 P.M. at Lyndon City Hall, 515 Wood Road. [Park Planning]

At least one mainstream media outlet is remembering that Steve Beshear has only recently – as in, the past two weeks – been interested in tax reform. They’re even remembering that David Williams called for a tax reform commission more than a year ago. [WFPL]

How excited are you that Greg Fischer will deliver his second State of the City address on the 12th at Downtown Rotary? [Deep Mayoral Thoughts]

Papaw Beshear wisely rejected the University of Louisville Hospital merger request. Again. [WHAS11]

Really, it’s just silly for counties like Jefferson and Fayette to be forced to have constables. This is just another reason why. At least this guy didn’t shoot a woman. [H-L]

Remember that time Louisville had a bridge disaster and no one could get anywhere at all, ever, forever and ever? [FOX41]

Greg Fischer is going to Michigan today to meet with Ford. For what reason, he doesn’t know. Meanwhile, his folks continue to buy and sell metro government. [The 'Ville Voice Here & Here]

Changes to the Jefferson County Public Schools student assignment plan have been approved. [WAVE3]

The Kentucky Derby Museum is hosting an Urban Bourbon exhibit. We hope it’s not just some advertising stunt for some bad bourbon that’s overhyped when there’s tons of great products in the Commonwealth. [Business First]

JCPS board folks decided to approve merit pay at four failing schools in hopes of making improvements. [WLKY]

Now that Robert White’s been shown the door, who will Greg Fischer select? Do you have high hopes? Is it worth holding your breath? We wish LMPD officers could have a say in the matter.  [WFPL]

It’s been a year and Sullivan student Andrew Compton’s body is still missing. It’s a shame for this community that people like him are typically forgotten. [FOX41]

A discussion about art and quilts sounds like the most mind-numbing thing ever, right? Especially at 9:30 A.M. on a Saturday? Yep. But this one at The Green Building is likely going to be quite enjoyable. [Consuming Louisville]

Remember when that crazy guy poured 15 buckets of asphalt on the steps of the federal courthouse in 2006? Steps are being taken to prevent that from happening again. $800,000 worth of steps, that is. [WAVE3]

Ford got a fancy Moody’s credit rating upgrade. Thank goodness something in Kentucky isn’t completely falling apart. [Business First]

We’re torn between feeling relieved that Robert White is on his way out and sorry for the citizens of Denver. [WHAS11]

For the first time, voter registration in Jefferson County has surpassed the 500,000 mark. Too bad none of those folks will be voting on November 8. [C-J/AKN]

Child sex perverts are going high-tech, apparently, and this is a reason for everybody to freak out like woah. [H-L]

Maybe it’s time for you to take a look at the latest campaign finance numbers to roll out of Kentucky’s gubernatorial race. [Page One]

While everyone in Louisville is wetting their pants over the opening of Trader Joe’s, it’s probably a good idea for them to think with their heads for a minute. Maybe ask a few questions about why the store refuses to support a policy for tomato pickers that even McDonald’s and Yum! support. [More FOX41]

Your favorite mayoral clone, Greg Fischer, is still refusing to lead. And it’s been how many days since the latest scandal? [The 'Ville Voice]

Gigantic pee alert! HAHAHAHAHA. Wow. You’ve got to see this. [C-J/AKN]

Matthew Barzun is once again making it rain for President Barack Obama. This time for his re-election campaign. [ABC News]

Have you taken a look at gubernatorial campaign finance numbers in Kentucky? Check out our stories with from Friday. [Page One Here & Here]

Occupy Louisville’s permit now allows the group to remain until the end of the year. [FOX41]

More than a month later, effects of the Sherman Minton closure are still being felt by businesses. We all expect those “effects” to be felt for months to come, right? [WAVE3]

For the most part, Louisville isn’t racist or bigoted. The city welcomes immigrants with open arms. This is a perfect example of that and it’s why Louisville can have nice things. [Business First]

No, these “occupiers” won’t change anything. This is the United States – where stagnation is the norm. But this particular protest is way more effective and made way more impact than what’s going on downtown. [WHAS11]

Voting began today for the UAW at the local Ford union hall. Locals seem to be split down the middle on a deal. [WLKY]

Jim Host says the arena has been a huge success. What do you think, Louisville? [H-L]

What was that, again, about the local Clear Channel talk box not focusing on the most extreme and salacious? [84WHAS]

Papaw Beshear will be at a presser in New Albany, Indiana today at 9:30 A.M. to discuss the Sherman Minton Bridge. [Press Release]

A mayoral candidate in Indiana is upstaging Steve Beshear and crew by announcing the Sherman Minton will reopen within two months. [WHAS11]

Mitch Daniels can’t even manage his state’s bridges. Of course he couldn’t run for the presidency. [Slate]

The pre-application process begins on Monday for heating assistance. It’s going to be mind-boggling to see how many people need help this year. [WAVE3]

Just a reminder that if you know someone who is committing disability fraud, report them ASAP. [Page One]

The Saint James Court Art Shenanigans are this weekend. Are you going to go spend all kinds of money? We hope so. Because it’s why Louisville can have nice things. [FOX41]

Ford could add some 10,000 jobs but would any of them end up in Louisville? [Business First]

Steve Beshear is the biggest coal shill in Kentucky but no Democrats want to admit it or have a discussion about it. [WLKY]

Greg Fischer is riding his bike for the second time this year. We hope you’re doing the same and we hope the city makes it easier and easier for you to do so. [Broken Sidewalk]

We stand by our assertion that Greg Fischer only ran for mayor to appear more frequently in the local party rags and to embarrass us on White House video. [WFPL]

The hospital merger? It’s going to happen. Steve Beshear and Jack Conway will make certain. [C-J/AKN]

The Federal Trade Commission is definitely on board with the merger and Democrats will stand behind that. [WAVE3]

Jack Conway could get beat. Aison Grimes, Adam Edelen and Jamie Comer all might lose their races. At least, that’s according to the latest polling from PPP. [Page One]

Tom Van De Rostyne announced yesterday that he will run for Jefferson County Commonwealth’s Attorney in the Democratic Primary next year. [Press Release]

Judy Green is super-corrupt and keen on taking in as many of your tax dollars as possible. She’s ignoring a subpoena and now the charging committee is seeking immediate removal. [WFPL]

Redevelopment of the Red Mile race track might include instant racing. [H-L]

Jump into the Third Annual Golden Poo Awards nomination posts. There are six categories of fun so far. [Page One]

Every other part of town got to experience a water main break this summer. Now the West End is getting its turn. [FOX41]

And just like that, local Ford workers decided to call a strike if discussions fail. [C-J/AKN]

Why Quilts Matter will premier on KET on September 5. [Consuming Louisville]

Miller Trailways launched “low-fare” bus service to Frankfort and Lexington. [Business First]

The Engine Ten fire station on Ashland Avenue in Beechmont has reopened after renovation. [WHAS11]

While MSD isn’t formally part of Metro Government, it most certainly can be sued like it is and it has to abide by open records laws. [C-J/AKN]

If you owe child support, you need to pay it. Don’t have a kid if you aren’t willing to foot the bill. [FOX41]

Judy Green’s attorney, paid for with your tax dollars, says the Ethics folks misread the ethics law. [WFPL]

Remember when everybody had a fit over John Yarmuth supporting health care reform legislation? This should throw water on the mouth-breathers who proclaimed he was lining his pockets. Almost Family’s profit fell 41%. [AP]

Yesterday marked the 117th day Republican Party of Kentucky Chairman Steve Robertson questioned Jack Conway over his involvement in his brother’s drug scandal: “Reasonable people wonder how the state Attorney General can just sweep charges this serious under the rug,” said Robertson. “Kentuckians don’t want corruption in their state government and they sure don’t want an Attorney General that hands out favors for his friends and family.” [Press Release]

There is some sort of robot thing in late October that you may be interested in. [Consuming Louisville]

Should we all hold our breath on the reopening of Kentucky Kingdom next year or not? [FOX41]

Jack Conway appointed a special prosecutor to investigate his opponent, Todd P’Pool. [Page One]

If you frighten meemaw when you visit late at night, she’s probably going to shoot you. [WAVE3]

This is so surprising. Such a shocker! The public wants an East End bridge built over the Ohio River and they don’t want to pay tolls. [C-J/AKN]

Local Ford employees say they are considering whether or not to authorize a strike. [WHAS11]

Donna Hargens is in town until Monday night and she says she’s ready to lead Jefferson County Public Schools. Is she? [WHAS11]

Against the Grain is apparently going to be woah better than Browning’s. Specifically for vegetarians and vegans. [Consuming Louisville]

You should certainly take this trip down the memory hole with Jack Conway. [Page One]

Branden Klayko has disappeared again. The internets eated him. [Broken Sidewalk]

We’re excited as anyone about the Ford news, so quit emailing us about it. It wasn’t news to us because Ford made the announcement months ago. [FOX41]

Mark Carter has become the permanent CEO of Passport. [Business First]

Kentucky’s obesity rating is horribly upsetting to many people. So you know what people should do? They should turn things around with a tiny bit of effort. [WAVE3]

When more than 30 percent of your population is considered obese? Something is wrong. [Click the Clicky]

Really, now they want a public-private partnership for the bridges that are never going to get built? This would be hilarious if it weren’t so serious. [84WHAS]

Kentucky Special Olympians have returned from the World Games in Athens, Greece with 14 medals. [H-L]

Greg Fischer and his advisers may be absolutely clueless when it comes to animal care and we may need to bulldoze LMAS. But in the meantime? You should consider supporting An Act of Dog – a massive push to visualize how simple it is to be no-kill. [An Act of Dog]